Exercise #4: Write a website article that encourages visitors to sign up for a weight loss program. The tone used should be encouraging, sensitive and attractive the target audience.
Example of poor copy - “If you want to stop wasting your life and being a wuss letting people walk all over you, you need help. You’re not going to make it on your own and you need someone to help you do it. Of course, if you’re happy where you are being a loser, that’s your choice. I’m not going to try to convince you. My time is valuable.”
Example of poor copy - “If you want to stop wasting your life and being a wuss letting people walk all over you, you need help. You’re not going to make it on your own and you need someone to help you do it. Of course, if you’re happy where you are being a loser, that’s your choice. I’m not going to try to convince you. My time is valuable.”
Rewrite:
Are you tired of wasting money and time slogging it out and losing nearly nothing?
With this program we don’t treat you different, we treat you like a person and as a person you want results! Not being screamed and yelled at like drill Sergeant having a bad day.
We here know this is a wrong approach and is not going to get you anywhere so we supply a friendly atmosphere and plenty of exercises to choose from. Don’t be told you’re not good enough because you are here.
If you want to contact someone on the course or just want to chat. Call 12352 23451 NOW! To get a hold on your weight and keep it off FOREVER!
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